The Librarian

“Certainly, Margarita Tikhonovna,” I agreed readily.

She pondered for a moment and asked out of the blue:

“Alexei, do you believe in God? Only answer me honestly, without any false pathos or sneering.”

“I probably do,” I said.

“Do you go to church?” Margarita Tikhonovna asked specifically. “Do you confess and take communion?”

I didn’t understand what she was getting at and answered cautiously, in order not to startle away her permission to flee.

“No, I don’t go to church. Basically, I believe in something, but I don’t know exactly what.”

“The court understands the facts,” Margarita Tikhonovna said with a smile. “Your life is hard, Alexei. Without a god, without inspiration. Nothing but fear. I don’t know how you haven’t gone insane… But I can give you a present to annul all the terrors that you have been through. I will give God back to you… No, don’t be afraid. I’m not talking about some sort of sectarian jiggery-pokery. No one will try to ensnare you. What you will soon become directly aware of is probably one of the proofs of His existence. In order to believe, for some people it is enough to see the sunset in the mountains, or the ocean, for instance. For you it will be a Book. While they’re tidying up in the minibus, I’ll tell you a little bit about Gromov… After all, you’re still completely ignorant…”